stuck on repeat

why is the one you don't want to think of the only thing you can think of and why do we tell ourselves it's fine when we know it's not.
i'm so insecure about it all when i've told myself over and over again that i'm over it but everytime it comes up again it's clear that i'm not over it i wish it'd just go away i wish i could pretend like it never happened and not hold it against him but it's just so hard to forget.
when you get hurt so badly how do you get over it when will i get the chance to look him in the eye say i've forgotten it and really mean it.

if it's in your words then it's in your voice

its all to hard to believe

It's hard to understand sometimes how you got where you are now and where to go next
in these next 4 weeks i'm going to have to try my hardest but it seems to hard to accomplish and when you're so far away from the thing you wnat the most and it's completely unrealted i sometimes find myself wondering what is the point of it all.
The internet is a misleading place and the complexities behind it and the lies people tell make me all so confused.


I just don't know what to do with myself really.